“Whether it was two days, or a month, or a longer time, that the cloud continued over the tabernacle, abiding there, the people of Israel remained in camp and did not set out, but when it lifted they set out.” (Numbers 9:22).

The people of Israel were led by God with a cloud by day and fire by night. They followed as the Lord led them. It wasn’t without a lot of complaining either. As I read through Numbers, I’m convicted of my own sin of complaining to the Lord and the frustration I have been causing those close to me.

A friend recently told me I needed to do what God has called me to. If I don’t those close to me will suffer from my not being obedient. I’m beginning to see what he was telling me six months ago.

I was visiting a young adult worship service back in the fall. It was an awesome time of worship and teaching. The message was on how to deal with depression. There were 10 points on the outline. Then Dave said, “Number 11, Do what the Lord is telling you to do.”

Have you ever been in a fog so thick you couldn’t drive? Life seems a bit like that right now for me. Sit tight until the fog lifts… And I complain, get angry, and make everyone else miserable.

After I read Numbers 9:22 tonight I began to think that maybe the cloud is not so bad afterall. Maybe life seems cloudy right now because Im not ready to move on. Whatever the reason for this season I embrace it and ask God to forgive me of my complaining.

“The call of God only becomes clear to us as we obey, never as we weigh the pros and cons and try to reason it out… When we hear the call of God it is not for us to dispute with God and arrange to obey him if he will expound the meaning of his call to us.” (Oswald Chambers Devotional Bible, “The Call of God”).

Does your life have what Oswald Chambers calls, “sacred and inexpressible charm about it that is satisfying to Jesus.”?

How does someone’s life bring about that kind of pleasure to Jesus? Chambers would say it is found in, “…continual willingness to “go out” in dependence upon God…”

I’m reading about that kind of faith lived out in the lives if so many found in the book of Genesis. Abraham and Sarah’s lives were a continual “‘go out’ in dependence on God.” I believe there are many people living today with broken dreams because they have chosen not to “go out.”

What keeps us from living in the potential of what God created us for? Why is it that some seem to serve the Lord with reckless abandon? While others shrink back in fear.

Fear is a gripping emotion that takes us into “watch out for myself” thinking. How often do we read in Scripture about someone being spoken to by an angel of the Lord and hear, “Do not be afraid…” Once we lock ourselves in on fear we will not hear anything else. We will not move… we will not walk in faith.

On New Years Eve I was playing a game with my son. He was sitting on the sofa and said, “Daddy when I grow up I want to be just like you.” I’ve thought about those words a lot since then. I’ve thought about our relationship and my desire for him to grow up knowing, loving, and serving Jesus.

I’ve realized these past couple of days that my desire for him is much like the desire Jesus has for me. To live and walk by faith… To “‘go out’ in dependence on God.”

Today as I look to my Heavenly Father I echo the words of my son to Him, “Daddy when I grow up I want to be just like You.”

I got home from work and the smell of chili in the air was fantastic! My wife had taken the time to make a large pot of chili on the stove. I sat my computer down and grabbed a spoon so I could taste and see the chili as it continued to simmer.

I’m still reading in the first chapters of Psalms. I can’t seem to move beyond the depth of prayer that David experienced. I linger over Chapter 5 where David says to God,

“Every morning you’ll hear me at it again. Every morning I lay out the pieces of my life on your altar and watch for the fire to descend.” (5:2-3, The Message).

Skip down to verses 7-8, “And here I am, your invited guest – it’s incredible! I enter your house, here I am, prostrate in your inner sanctum, waiting for directions to get me through enemy lines.”

There is a depth of living in God’s presence that I want to experience. it seems like I don’t spend the time necessary to move beyond the surface of this life. I note in these words of David that God could count on him, “EVERY MORNING I lay out the pieces of my life…”

David had a time and he was consistent in going before the Lord. He was also patient as I read in verse 8, “Waiting for directions to get me safely through enemy lines.”

My prayer life so often is me running out the door, sipping my coffee, while racing to work. At least I have the every morning piece of this together. It’s strange that I expect to know how God wants me to navigate my life on this hap-hazard prayer time racing to work.

It’s time I throw away my microwaved prayers and learn to simmer in the Lord’s presence so that the fragrance can fill up the room… fill up my life so that others can say, “Hey, there is something about that guy.” That something being the love of Jesus.

We sat down for leftover chili the next evening and each bowl had been individually microwaved for the sake of time. As we sat down to eat we discovered not all the bowls had been heated thoroughly. The chili was only hot on the surface.

It’s time to move beyond the surface and dig deep into the presence of God every morning and to wait for his direction.

I’ve started teaching my daughter to drive. It’s been a great experience and I have cherished every moment with her behind the wheel. I can tell with each day she sits down in the drivers seat she is gaining more confidence.

In Andy Stanley’s message, “Pray until the peace comes,” he asks, “What drives your prayers?” I answered, “Fear and worry.”

As my daughter got behind the wheel for the first time I know she was afraid. I’m not sure what she was most afraid of (the car, messing up, or how I might react to her messing up). Over several days she has gotten better with more and more confidence.

As I’ve observed and coached my daughter, I’ve thought about my own fears and how often I don’t allow God to coach and train me through my fears. I am not like my daughter learning to drive as I tend to grip the steering wheel of life too tightly, step on the gas too hard, and when it comes to braking – I haven’t quite managed how to delicately apply them. I’m getting concerned that maybe I’m frustrating God with my inability to overcome my fears.

“If you don’t know what you’re doing, pray to the Father. He loves to help. You’ll get his help, and want be condescended to when you ask for it. Ask boldly, believingly, without a second thought. People who ‘worry their prayers’ are like wind-whipped waves.” (James 1:5-7, The Message).

“…get serious, really serious. Get down on you knees before the Master; it’s the only way you’ll get on your feet,” (James 4:8b-9, The Message).

2009 has been a great year for me. It has also been a very difficult one. I know a week ago God began leading me to focus on prayer for the remainder of this year. A much different kind of prayer.

“The prayer of a person living right with God is something powerful to be reckoned with.” (James 5:16b, The Message).

The title of the talk I heard Andy Stanley give, “Pray until the peace comes” has become my personal theme for the rest of this year. I must let God in on what my deepest fears and desires are.

The words of Paul sum it up,

“Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers. Letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.” (Philippians 4:6-7, The Message).

I’m praying until the peace comes.

Thanks to my good friend Joel, front man for Even Adam, I have been challenged by this word integrate.  I highly recommend reading his post, Integrating Worship.

After reading his post I began to ask myself, “What have I been integrating into my life?”  I’m not thrilled with the findings.  There’s a lot of worry that has come into my life in recent weeks.  To be totally honesty - worry has overcome the worship.  Oswald Chambers helped me as I began to ask myself the above question.

“. . . do not worry about your life . . . .” Don’t take the pressure of your provision upon yourself. It is not only wrong to worry, it is unbelief; worrying means we do not believe that God can look after the practical details of our lives, and it is never anything but those details that worry us. Have you ever noticed what Jesus said would choke the Word He puts in us? Is it the devil? No— “the cares of this world” (Matthew 13:22 ). It is always our little worries. We say, “I will not trust when I cannot see”— and that is where unbelief begins. The only cure for unbelief is obedience to the Spirit.

Are you being obedient to the Lord?  Are you living the life he has called you to?  Are you taking the cares of this world upon yourself?  Or have you integrated worship and prayer into your daily life? 

God’s purposes and plans will always prevail.  Don’t trade worship in for worry.  I read the book of Ruth in the Bible today.  You need to read the book to get the context of Ruth 2:20,

Naomi said to her daughter-in-law, “Why, God bless that man!  God hasn’t quite walked out on us after all!  He still loves us, in bad times as well as good!” (The Message).

I was at my daughter’s softball practice earlier this week for her traveling team the Bartow Blue Sox.  I absolutely love being at those practices!  There are several reasons for it but that’s not the purpose of this post.

At Monday’s practice, I was listening to both of the coaches as they were doing what they love… coaching Fast-Pitch Softball.  One of the assistant coaches was in the outfield instructing the players.  His voice is awesome!  He has this deep booming voice that carries.  I made a comment to the other parents about loving his voice.  Several minutes went by and one of the parents made this comment:

I think I figured it out!  The difference between these two coaches and others my daughter has played for is heart.

Her comment is so true.  These coaches don’t get paid to coach 12 & Under Fast-pitch Softball… they do it for the love of the game and these kids… they do it I would guess because they get a great sense of satisfaction from it.

In Erwin McManus’ book Wide Awake, he asks this question, “What moment in your life has brought you the greatest sense of satisfaction?” (191).  How do you answer this question?

I bet no matter how you answer it – it is answered in the context with other people.  McManus states,

You will not enjoy life at its richest level until you learn how to have deep, meaningful, relationships, because life is enjoyed best with people. (199).

When I look at my daughter’s team, I see a group of girls enjoying life and the sport.  I see several coaches enjoying this group of girls grow together and develop as a team, as girls, and as people developing character. 

We were not created to be alone.  We were created to enjoy this life and we were created to spend our lives with other people.  To share our gifts with those we do life with day in and day out.

While reading in The Message this morning, there are three verses that stand out to me:

• Grace and peace to you many times over as you deepen in your experience with God and Jesus, our Master (2 Peter 1:2).
• Jesus resplendent with light from God the Father as the voice of Majestic Glory spoke: “This is my Son, marked by my love, focus of all my delight.” (2 Peter 1:17).
• The main thing to keep in mind here is that no prophecy of Scripture is a matter of private opinion.  And why? Because it’s not something concocted in the human heart. Prophecy resulted when the Holy Spirit prompted men and women to speak God’s Word. (2 Peter 1:20-21).

If we are to “Rise to the Occasion…“, we must have these three truths found in 2 Peter evident in our lives from the inside out:

1. We must be deepening in our experience with God and Jesus.
2. We must be marked by God’s love.
3. We must speak when prompted by the Holy Spirit. Not holding back but speaking God’s Message with love and grace.

I love these two words used together, “inside out”.  Our lives are hungry…  There is a deepening desire within us all to be changed from the inside out.  There is a hunger that can only be fulfilled by God’s love and grace found in Jesus. 

As I read 2 Peter this morning, I was reminded of the ways sin tries to destroy us and to keep us focused on feeding those desires of our flesh.  The Holy Spirit comes and changes us from the inside out.  I didn’t realize this until someone took the time to speak God’s love to me with love and grace.  Are you making the most of every opportunity?

As you go through this day and the rest of this week ask yourself:

1. Am I deepening in my experience with Jesus?
2. Is my life being marked by God’s love? 
3. How can I be used by the Holy Spirit to speak of God’s love and grace with words and actions?

I haven’t asked the question in awhile:  How are you doing with your Read through the Bible for 2009?  Are you on task with your goal for the year?  Have you begun to develop a healthy habit in reading the Bible?  I hope so!

The past several weeks have been tough for me.  My routine and schedule has been turned upside down.  I have been feeling a bit guilty for not staying on track with where I wanted to be.  Everyday I think, “I need to read the Bible.” 

Has reading the Bible become all about checking a box?  Or is reading the Bible drawing us closer and deeper in a relationship with Jesus? 

Of course, Oswald Chambers would have something to say on this!

Your god may be your little Christian habit— the habit of prayer or Bible reading at certain times of your day. Watch how your Father will upset your schedule if you begin to worship your habit instead of what the habit symbolizes. (My Utmost for His Highest, May 12).

This was a great reality check for me.  Reading God’s Word should never be about getting through it – like some book.  God’s Word is His voice to us…  Providing truth, life, freedom, and correction.  The focus of our everyday reading should never be about just being able to say, “I read the Bible for the day.”  It needs to be about, “What does God want to say to me today?”

As you continue reading through the Bible this year, make sure you are spending time to draw closer to Him as you read.  Don’t trade God in for the Christian habit (god).

Love means that there are no visible habits— that your habits are so immersed in the Lord that you practice them without realizing it. (My Utmost for His Highest, May 12).

I never get tired of saying, “Oswald Chambers strikes again!”  Day after day and year after year of reading My Utmost for His Highest never gets old.  Each year that I read it – it’s as if I am reading it for the first time.  It may be because I didn’t “get it” the year before or there is always something new in me that needs a bit of work.  Honestly, it’s a little of both.

Saturday I received a letter from a former student heading to the Czech Republic this summer to be His hands and His feet.  I am so excited and proud of her!  I hear great things all of the time from that group of teens that were in my first youth ministry out of seminary.  Every time I hear another great report about one of them it makes me miss those days from the mid 90’s in New Mexico all the more.  I miss the teens and I miss that season in my life.

I seem to always use that season of my life as the plumb line for everything else.  I know that I shouldn’t.  But for whatever reason I continually look back and wish God used me now like He did then.  Has he changed? No.  So, what happened?  I guess my own personal fears have taken over and overcome my fear of the LORD.

Have I really placed my personal fears before my fear of the LORD?  Paul told Timothy, “Be ready in season and out of season.”  I’m personally torn right now within my life.  Too many times I get afraid of making the wrong choice – again.  I don’t want to make anymore mistakes or to get myself out on a limb to find myself falling back to the ground once again… broken, hurt, or embarrassed that the dream is not to be.  I’m starting to see myself as the one who buried his talent in the sand.

Oh the dreaded words, “If I could only go back…”

This is a new day – with new opportunities.  One thing from the past I must put on everyday is my total reliance on Jesus Christ.  I’ll never forget my first day “on the job’ at FBC.  That walk from my car up the sidewalk to the door of the church seems so long in my memory – when it was probably only 20 steps.  Yet, the whisper I spoke to Jesus I will never forget, “This is all you – I have no idea what awaits me on the other side of this door.”  The fear of the LORD far outweighed my own personal fears that were on the other side of that door.

The fear that I feel today is the result of a much different set of circumstances.  Despite the fear I have today – I wish, hope, and daydream of moments like what I had back then.  I was living “in season” then – preaching the Word the best I knew how – with my life, love, and friendship that God gave me to give.  I’m not serving on staff like that now and I think of doing that again some day.  I do know God wants me to be faithful with the life I have been given in this day that I live.  I’m reminded that no matter where I am in life  – it’s always the season to serve the Lord – to be His hands and his feet.

This is the thought from Saturday’s My Utmost for His Highest that go my wheels to turning on this subject.

If you say you will only be at your best for God, as during those exceptional times, you actually become an intolerable burden on Him. You will never do anything unless God keeps you consciously aware of His inspiration to you at all times. If you make a god out of your best moments, you will find that God will fade out of your life, never to return until you are obedient in the work He has placed closest to you, and until you have learned not to be obsessed with those exceptional moments He has given you. (April 25).

No matter where you find yourself today – this is the season for you to shine with whatever God has given you.  Make the most of every opportunity and life like there is no tomorrow.  Somebody else needs you to live your life the way God has called you to today - be available no matter how you feel – You’ve got a story to tell!

Everyday that we live - each of us have opportunities that come before us to help us grow.  It is what we do with those opportunities that determine to what extent we will be developed.  Do you embrace the challenges and with the fear of the LORD move forward?  Or do you worry and fear the barrier?  As I finished up reading Joshua this weekend, I saw a man who took the most of his opportunity to grow and be developed.  He had a tremendous job taking Israel into the Promised Land and establishing her boundaries.

I wonder how he felt at the moment he knew what his task was going to be?  I wonder if he ever worried or feared the job before him.  Joshua stayed true to God’s leading.  Joshua ends with this challenge to the people of Israel,

“Now fear the LORD and serve him with all faithfulness. Throw away the gods your forefathers worshiped beyond the River and in Egypt, and serve the LORD. But if serving the LORD seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your forefathers served beyond the River, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the LORD.” (Joshua 24:14-15, New International Version).

I suspect Joshua’s fear of the LORD far out-weighed the fear of the task before him.  Joshua lived with a proper perspective of his life and his service to the LORD.

If you will remain true to God, God will lead you directly through every barrier and right into the inner chamber of the knowledge of Himself. But you must always be willing to come to the point of giving up your own convictions and traditional beliefs. Don’t ask God to test you. Never declare as Peter did that you are willing to do anything, even “to go . . . both to prison and to death” ( Luke 22:33  ). Abraham did not make any such statement— he simply remained true to God, and God purified his faith.  (Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest, April 26).

What is the barrier in your life? 

Whatever the barrier hold fast to the truth you have gained from God.  Fear the LORD way more than the barrier.  Keep your eyes on Jesus – pray without ceasing and allow His Spirit to fully develop you to be the person you are created to be.

Whatever I have, wherever I am, I can make it through anything in the One who makes me who I am. (Philippians 4:13, The Message).