Archive for the ‘ Family ’ Category

Daddy when I grow up…

Does your life have what Oswald Chambers calls, “sacred and inexpressible charm about it that is satisfying to Jesus.”?

How does someone’s life bring about that kind of pleasure to Jesus? Chambers would say it is found in, “…continual willingness to “go out” in dependence upon God…”

I’m reading about that kind of faith lived out in the lives if so many found in the book of Genesis. Abraham and Sarah’s lives were a continual “‘go out’ in dependence on God.” I believe there are many people living today with broken dreams because they have chosen not to “go out.”

What keeps us from living in the potential of what God created us for? Why is it that some seem to serve the Lord with reckless abandon? While others shrink back in fear.

Fear is a gripping emotion that takes us into “watch out for myself” thinking. How often do we read in Scripture about someone being spoken to by an angel of the Lord and hear, “Do not be afraid…” Once we lock ourselves in on fear we will not hear anything else. We will not move… we will not walk in faith.

On New Years Eve I was playing a game with my son. He was sitting on the sofa and said, “Daddy when I grow up I want to be just like you.” I’ve thought about those words a lot since then. I’ve thought about our relationship and my desire for him to grow up knowing, loving, and serving Jesus.

I’ve realized these past couple of days that my desire for him is much like the desire Jesus has for me. To live and walk by faith… To “‘go out’ in dependence on God.”

Today as I look to my Heavenly Father I echo the words of my son to Him, “Daddy when I grow up I want to be just like You.”

What drives your prayers?

I’ve started teaching my daughter to drive. It’s been a great experience and I have cherished every moment with her behind the wheel. I can tell with each day she sits down in the drivers seat she is gaining more confidence.

In Andy Stanley’s message, “Pray until the peace comes,” he asks, “What drives your prayers?” I answered, “Fear and worry.”

As my daughter got behind the wheel for the first time I know she was afraid. I’m not sure what she was most afraid of (the car, messing up, or how I might react to her messing up). Over several days she has gotten better with more and more confidence.

As I’ve observed and coached my daughter, I’ve thought about my own fears and how often I don’t allow God to coach and train me through my fears. I am not like my daughter learning to drive as I tend to grip the steering wheel of life too tightly, step on the gas too hard, and when it comes to braking – I haven’t quite managed how to delicately apply them. I’m getting concerned that maybe I’m frustrating God with my inability to overcome my fears.

“If you don’t know what you’re doing, pray to the Father. He loves to help. You’ll get his help, and want be condescended to when you ask for it. Ask boldly, believingly, without a second thought. People who ‘worry their prayers’ are like wind-whipped waves.” (James 1:5-7, The Message).

“…get serious, really serious. Get down on you knees before the Master; it’s the only way you’ll get on your feet,” (James 4:8b-9, The Message).

2009 has been a great year for me. It has also been a very difficult one. I know a week ago God began leading me to focus on prayer for the remainder of this year. A much different kind of prayer.

“The prayer of a person living right with God is something powerful to be reckoned with.” (James 5:16b, The Message).

The title of the talk I heard Andy Stanley give, “Pray until the peace comes” has become my personal theme for the rest of this year. I must let God in on what my deepest fears and desires are.

The words of Paul sum it up,

“Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers. Letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.” (Philippians 4:6-7, The Message).

I’m praying until the peace comes.

Why did you win?

Last weekend I was hanging out with friends at their home. It was overcast most of the day. I like dark and dreary days… I love rainy days even more!

My son was alarmed by the sky and afraid it was going to rain. He wanted to swim and didn’t want his fun in the pool spoiled with bad weather. He looked at me and said, “I’m going to pray that it doesn’t rain.” I smiled and said, “You do that buddy and I’m going to pray that it rains.”

Well, it wasn’t much longer before the rain began. He was in the house at the time it started. He came outside and said, “Why did you win?” I could see the disappointment on his face and hear it in the tone of his voice.

My response to him was: “Turn around and look up at the sky. God is giving you right now the blue sky you have asked for. You see, God has answered both of our prayers today. He loves us both and desires to give us both the desires of our hearts.”

I love my son! He is 7 years old. As his Dad I want to give him everything his little heart desires. But more than the stuff he wants to play with I want to give him Jesus. I want to make the most of every opportunity so he can grow strong in his faith, understanding of God, and the love God has for him. He is learning to seek God in all things. At 7 years of age, I’m excited to see him learn to pray. I know God has great plans for him…

God has great plans for all of us. When life all around is looking dark and dreary… When the rains begin to fall… Don’t give up hope! Cling to these words found in the Bible,

“Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Give your attention to what God is doing right now, and don’t get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes” (Matthew 6:33-34, The Message).

Open House

Last night was the last open house before school starts.  All of my children have been excited to find out which teachers they have, to see schedules, and to reunite friendships that took a break with the summer.  It was a big night for us all with lots of high hopes and great expectations for a great school year.

As I walked the hallways, I began to see something that troubled my heart and thoughts.  In fact, what I saw made me very sad.  It bothered me all last night and continues to haunt my thoughts today.  As I turned each corner of the school, I was concerned about the amount of hurt and disappointment that was walking the halls with me.  I saw numerous families that live in brokenness brought on by divorce.  My life is not different – and it really bothered me last night.  I came home and wrote in my journal about all of the hurts I was personally experiencing then moved on to ask the question, “I wonder how my kids were feeling?”

A friend of mine had  a baby that died as a newborn about 20 years ago.  I recall talking with him on the phone about it.  At the time, I was living over 800 miles away.  But in the moment I had a tremendous case of insensitivity.  I told him that one day God would use this tragedy to help someone else.  True… but oh how I wish I could take those words back – timing is everything!

I’ve been told that on numerous occassions that I will be able to help others going through divorce or dealing with the effects of divorce.  I understand the encouragement that has been extended with those words… (Sometimes God’s people should be seen and not heard)  The problem I see with this sort of counsel is that my kids are put on the altar as a sacrifice to help someone else.  I don’t really believe that is God’s plan.  Yet, I can see how God can use my life today to help others.

Within me is a well full of sorrow and pain brought on by divorce.  I’m thankful God has filled it with His love, grace, and compassion for others who have or will walk my same road.  How I wish I could counsel couple to work it out no matter what… I also know that in some cases working it out is not an option.

So, as we begin another school year filled with so much excitement – let’s not forget those children who are dealing with the disappointments in life brought on by selfish parents.  The losers are the children.  Those of us who can help need to stand in the gap for them.

What can you do? Become a mentor.  Volunteer at your church with children or youth.  Begin praying daily for specific children.  Select a school and prayer walk each week for the children and for the teachers.  There are many options to get involved.  Seek God as to how you can join Him in healing hearts… Start today!

Greatest sense of satisfaction…

I was at my daughter’s softball practice earlier this week for her traveling team the Bartow Blue Sox.  I absolutely love being at those practices!  There are several reasons for it but that’s not the purpose of this post.

At Monday’s practice, I was listening to both of the coaches as they were doing what they love… coaching Fast-Pitch Softball.  One of the assistant coaches was in the outfield instructing the players.  His voice is awesome!  He has this deep booming voice that carries.  I made a comment to the other parents about loving his voice.  Several minutes went by and one of the parents made this comment:

I think I figured it out!  The difference between these two coaches and others my daughter has played for is heart.

Her comment is so true.  These coaches don’t get paid to coach 12 & Under Fast-pitch Softball… they do it for the love of the game and these kids… they do it I would guess because they get a great sense of satisfaction from it.

In Erwin McManus’ book Wide Awake, he asks this question, “What moment in your life has brought you the greatest sense of satisfaction?” (191).  How do you answer this question?

I bet no matter how you answer it – it is answered in the context with other people.  McManus states,

You will not enjoy life at its richest level until you learn how to have deep, meaningful, relationships, because life is enjoyed best with people. (199).

When I look at my daughter’s team, I see a group of girls enjoying life and the sport.  I see several coaches enjoying this group of girls grow together and develop as a team, as girls, and as people developing character. 

We were not created to be alone.  We were created to enjoy this life and we were created to spend our lives with other people.  To share our gifts with those we do life with day in and day out.

I love storms…

This weekend we saw our share of storms.  Friday night we were at the ball fields for Walker’s game when the sirens went off.  It was scary.  We had no idea that this storm was coming or how far off the storm was.  As quickly as the sirens sounded the winds were on us.  As I drove toward home I could see this wall of clouds off to our right.  I don’t think I’ve seen anything quite like that before.  I kept my thoughts to myself as we hurried down the road.  So the kids wouldn’t be alarmed.

Today we saw and heard the same thing…  More storms and sirens.  My son was excited about it all too.  As we watched the news we could see the storm moving toward us.  He kept asking, “How much longer until the sirens go off?”  Once the sirens sounded we headed for cover at my in-laws home.  For awhile we stood outside and watched the clouds as we listened to the sirens.  (He was very disappointed to find out we missed church tonight becuase of this storm!!)

Kind of strange but I have always liked stormy weather.  It seems to draw family together for those few moments.  The reality of life seems to come into view.  I find myself very focused during a storm.  The storm also breaks up the monotony of the day and adds a bit of excitement.

I was driving home this evening thinking about storms and wondering why I like them so much.  I thought about how stormy my life seems to stay.  I don’t like how the storm within my life feels.  I’m ready for the sirens within to quit sounding.  I’m ready for the voice to come over my heart and say, “The storm is over.”

Yet as I look over my thoughts about natural storms I see somewhat a correlation between natural storms and this storm that fills my life:

  • It is an irritant to the family but ultimate draws us together as we seek shelter together. 
  • The importance of life.
  • Brings focus and attention to the storm… the One who provides shelter from the storm.

Do I allow the storms into my life to intentionally bring these things into my life?  If so – I’m an idiot!  I’m so ready for this storm that seems to be disrupting my life to end.  I’m ready for the rainbow… I’m ready for the sunshine… I’m ready to walk the white sandy beaches and listen to the peaceful sounds of the waves crashing on the beach.  I’m ready for relief!!

Naked and barefooted

On Saturday, just before Walker’s baseball game he asked me, “Daddy, am I famous?”  He was so proud of the uniform that he was wearing.  I told him, “To the people watching you today you are famous.  They all look at you and see a baseball player”  I was very proud of him too.

All of us think about our outward appearances.  Oftentimes before we make a decision or do something that will be seen by others we will ask the question, “How is this going to make me look?”  We want acceptance from our family, our peers, our friends, our church, and church leaders.  We’ll do anything so we will “look good” to anyone who may see us as long as it means we keep our clothes on.  In fact, we are even willing to dress up the outward appearance just to make ourselves look better than what we really are.  All the while our insides are decaying.  We hide the most intimate details of our lives.

I must make a confession:  I like to watch the show “What Not to Wear”.  On this show people will nominate a friend who doesn’t know how to dress themselves.  Time after time when I watch this show individuals will have an experience that brings out something internally by addressing the external.  I find it interesting that there are so many people who have a quality about them on the inside that they hide with what they wear on the outside.  It’s amazing how many ways we can try and help people by attacking the external factors when what really needs to happen is change from the inside out.

What happens on the outside is a reflection of what is going on internally.  One may look good on the outside but if it is a mask that is being displayed that same mask is probably being worn on the inside.  It’s time for us to check ourselves and determine if what we are displaying matches the true person God intends for us to be.

The true deep crisis of abandonment, or total surrender, is reached internally, not externally. The giving up of only external things may actually be an indication of your being in total bondage. (Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest, April 17).

Jesus reminds us we are not to commit adultery and goes on to say if you have looked upon another with lust you have already committed adultery in your heart.  Sin is not only an action it is a thought - it begins in the heart.  Jesus is concerned about the inner well being of our hearts and souls.  What our hearts are made of will appear on the outside.  Out of the overflow of your heart your mouth speaks. (Luke 6:45).

“You don’t get wormy apples off a healthy tree, nor good apples off a diseased tree. The health of the apple tells the health of the tree. You must begin with your own life-giving lives. It’s who you are, not what you say and do, that counts. Your true being brims over into true words and deeds. (Luke 6:43-45, The Message).

Isaiah 20 tells us something that God instructed Isaiah to do.  He was told to remove his sandals and his clothes.  I am sure your town is much like mine – walking around town naked and barefooted is a sure way to get yourself locked up and/or committed!  But that’s what Isaiah did for three years.  Could you imagine what winter must have been like!?

We all cover ourselves up.  We don’t want to become vulnerable to other people so we put on something that others will accept.  After-all what we are most concerned about is what will others think.  Apparently, Isaiah wasn’t concerned.  He literally bared it all!!

Authentic community transpires when people are real with one another.  Just as I desire to be in community with others God desires that same community with me.  He wants me to become vulnerable with him – with total trust and confidence in him.

When was the last time you were naked and barefooted before God?

An event-filled weekend in April

roye-and-walker-at-applebees

Saturday morning at Applebee’s to support Jacqueline’s fundraiser for Steps of Faith Dance Studio.

004An hour and a half later we are at the ballpark preparing for Walker’s first Baseball game of the season.  He had 3 hits one of which was a double.  This is the 2nd run he scored.024

Valerie is playing on 2 softball teams this year.  One of which is a travel team.  Both teams played on Saturday.  The day began in Adairsville and ended in Rome, GA just before midnight with winning the tournament!!

057

Wide Awake…

…too many thoughts running through my head tonight (1:00 AM) to sleep.  While reading Wide Awake today there are several quotes I would like to bring to your attention:

  • Talent you don’t use is talent you have abused.  To waste what God has put in you is a dishonor to God and a disservice to humanity.
  • …your life is God’s gift to you and to the world.
  • The choices you make today create the future you live tomorrow. (Erwin McManus, 172).

I don’t know about you but I’ve never been one to look at myself in such a way to think that I am a gift to the world.  But the truth is God created all of as a gift to each other.  Each one of us has a gift and/or a talent within us to give to others.  The unfortunate thing is that most of us don’t realize that until it’s too late.  Or we have made choices that dictate our future. 

When I think about it like that – I wonder how many people miss out on knowing about Jesus because too many of us have never realized the potential within. 

Some never have the opportunity to realize their true potential because their spirits have been crushed.

Parents, don’t come down too hard on your children or you’ll crush their spirits.  (Colossians 3:21, The Message).

This is a message to parents:  I know this has been said before, “Our children are the future.”  That statement is true.  But if as parents we do not nurture them and build them up in Christ we will lose the next generation of leaders.  Leadership begins with us (parents)!  Do you want to be a leader?  Then take the responsibility to raise your children to love the Lord with all their hearts.  Encourage the creativity within them!

Maybe you are doing the job God has called you to in raising your children.  I want to say… Great job!!  Keep it up and look around.  I bet one of your children has a friend whose Mom or Dad is crushing their child’s spirit.  We need to have the eyes to see who it is we can reach out to with real love – the love of Jesus Christ… these children need our love.

As parents, we need to pick our battles wisely with our children.  We have a responsibility to see that they live in an environment that gives them the tools to make wise choices so that their future is without limit.

Are you with me on this?

Thoughts on today…

We have been attending Tapestry Church for the past month or so.  We have enjoyed the services and getting to know Richard.  Today and last Sunday there were not any services there.  I had decided not to go to church today and just spend some extra time reading and journaling this morning. 

I received a phone call yesterday from Valerie.  She wanted to go to church today.  So, I thought about where we might go today… I decided on Oakleaf.  Today Oakleaf started the year off with going to four services meeting in the Carmike Movie theatre.  It was a great service!  Joel was running the sound in the service I attended… (It was nice to hear The Choir’s “Sad Face” playing through the PA… a perk of running the sound is you get to pick the tunes).  I told him it was a bit loud this morning… but I was kidding!  The sound was awesome!  Will was leading worship with Dean ripping on that Fender of his.  (The Edge would be proud).

It was good to see many friends as well.  God is going some awesome things through Oakleaf.  There is a definite excitement in the air.  I was picking up Walker from the Children’s area and the person taking the security tag from me asked for my child’s name.  I said, “Walker.”  She went on to say, “Walker knows what his purpose in life is… He said it is to sing!” 

If she only knew the other half a dozen things he wants to be… they all involve wearing a costume with a cape.  I bet he may have some music in his future.  I’ve thought about buying him a drum set from DV… not sure if he still has it or not.  I do have a child’s guitar that I would like for him to start learning.  And for the past 2 years he has sung every song to Phantom of the Opera thousands of times!!  Literally.  At age 4 he knew all of the words to all of the songs!!!  I know whatever he sets his mind on he will succeed.  He has his favorite songs he likes to hear when he gets in the car:  “Marvelous Light” by Charlie Hall, “With Or Without You” by U2 and “In Your Eyes” by Peter Gabriel.

Thanks for a great day at Oakleaf and looking forward to Tapestry next week…