Nightswimming deserves a quiet night.
I’m not sure all these people understand.
It’s not like years ago,
The fear of getting caught,
Of recklessness and water.
They cannot see me naked.
These things, they go away,
Replaced by everyday.

I have always liked the song “Nightswimming” by R.E.M.  I have not ever known what it meant.  So if you know please enlighten me.  So why include this verse to a song if I don’t know what it means?  I don’t know.  But it came to mind none-the-less as I read Randy’s comment to To swim or not to swim when he quoted Brad’s Blog, “we ‘are just called along with The Servant to rely upon God despite the dark or pain or whatever.'”  Have you ever noticed that life is nothing but one big blog?

To talk about my situation would be to become vulnerable to someone else.  Although there is a tight inner-circle of people in my life who may hear about it.  Maybe 2 or 3 at the very most.  As the song says, “They cannot see me naked.” 

Nightswimming deserves a quiet night.  As Brad states, “Notice the direction given to those who walk in the dark; they are told to trust in the Lord in the dark, but they are not then promised light.”  It feels as though I am at sea swimming in the dark.  The deeper I go in the ocean of His love the darker the night becomes.  I’m taking on water drowning and giving Him the life that I have been living… trusting Him with it all.  Becoming vulnerable to The Servant.

Tonight I plunge deeper into God’s presence asking Him for mercy.  Asking Him for grace.  Asking Him to light my way.  I know that just because I pray and ask for His help the light switch may not be turned on… but I also know He is with me and there is no fear of getting caught I can and I will be vulnerable to God and look to my Redeemer – for He lives.


To swim or not to swim.

I told a friend the other day that I feel like I can quote Disney as good if not better than the Bible.  A situation has come into being this week that is hard for me to deal with.  Finding Nemo came to mind as I was thinking about my situation.  Not only that but it goes with this whole “Ocean” theme too.  God’s working overtime to make the point.  I just hope I get it – SOON!

Do you remember Dori the Blue Fin in Finding Nemo?  Well, there’s this scene when she is talking with Marlin the Clown Fish and she states, “You know what ‘cha got to do when life gets you down?”  She begins to sing her answer, “Just keep swimming, just keep swimming…”

In someways my wife (Lori) reminds me of Dori.  (Hey they rhyme… this is getting scary). I’m sure she will appreciate the comparison.  When I take a hit from life I tend to respond a whole lot like Marlin.  And Lori she responds a lot like Dori… “just keep swimming.”  She always comes back with encouragement and optimism.  Tends to make me sick.  But I must confess she is right.  (I hope she doesn’t read this…) It just takes me awhile to warm up to it.

So… should I swim or drown? I my gosh… I’m so conflicted.

I need to surrender.  Lay down the situation that holds me down and ask God to take control.  I need to quit fighting the current and let God have it all.  I’m tired of swimming against it.

The Law of the Lord is perfect, reviving the soul.  The statutes of the Lord are trustworthy, making wise the simple.  The precepts of the Lord are right, giving joy to the heart.  The commands of the Lord are radiant, giving light to the eyes.  The fear of the Lord is pure, enduring forever.  The ordinances of the Lord are sure and altogether righteous.  They are more precious than gold, than much pure gold; they are sweeter than honey, than honey from the comb. By them is your servant warned; in keeping them there is great reward. (Psalm 19:7-11, NIV).