I’m having surgery

I’m having surgery on my heart… not physically but rather spiritually.

How does one know if one is living in the sin of “unbelief”?  “He did not do many mighty works there because of their unbelief” ( Matthew 13:58 ).

If Jesus could not do miracles in the presence of those with unbelief…

  • Is this why we do not see the supernatural at work in and around our lives? 
  • Is this why we seem to not be able to hear the Lord in times of searching for direction? 
  • Is it that we suffer from the sin of unbelief?
  • Is this why vision is hard to discern?

This is why I pray, “Lord I believe but help me with my unbelief.”  See Mark 9:24.

I’m revisiting so many days recorded in the “Book of Roye”.  Many know of it as my journal.  I am going back and pulling CD’s and listening to songs God used to speak to me.  I’m trying to capture those moments gone by to see how I responded to God’s leadership and direction in my life.  To see if just maybe I’m missing something today.  I’m concerned about my possible “unbelief”.  I ask, “Is that the issue?”  Or is God playing hide and seek with me?

I had surgery earlier this year and my doctor decided to try something with me… exploring to see if it would work.  It was successful.  He thought I was a good case due to my high tolerance for pain.  Is God exploring with me in this same manner… testing my tolerance for pain?” 

How do I (or any of us) respond to Chambers devotional today?

If we really believed that God meant what He said, just imagine what we would be like! Do I really dare to let God be to me all that He says He will be?

So, in this sense I’m having surgery.  It is exploratory surgery at best.  Exploring myself from the outside in and finding out it’s me again.  Dealing with the same issue…

Lord, I believe – but help me with my unbelief.

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