abandon self

Two words.  So hard to translate into life. 

According to Dictionary.com, abandon means:

to leave completely and finally; forsake utterly; desert

to give up the control of

Can one forsake utterly themselves… give up the total control?  It’s hard to live this way.  This totally goes against the grain of human nature!

Tonight I’m thinking of one of my friends stories he told us in our men’s group.  Each year for the past several years he would drive from Georgia to New Mexico, Arizona, and Colorado for vacation with his son.  At the time they would pull out in the Jeep, he would remind his son that the entire ride was the vacation… not just the destination.  So off they’d go to the beautiful Southwest enjoying the entire journey. 

I’m also reminded of the time I moved back to Georgia with my family from New Mexico.  My 3 children were born in Texas and New Mexico.  They’ve never lived here in Georgia.  My oldest wanted to ride with me in the truck we rented to get our stuff here.  She wasn’t content with a bird’s eye view of the country from the airplane… she wanted to experience the country from the ground upclose and personal.  We were all excited about the destination… but she didn’t want to miss the journey getting here.

Too often in life I have gotten so focused on the the destination in life that I have neglected the journey.  I’m learning more and more each day what life is about.  It’s not about me.  It’s not about my career or where I will end up one day ministerially speaking… It’s all about God.  Everything: the good, the bad, the ugly, and the beautiful.  I’ve always believed this but I don’t think I’ve ever really lived it… or at least to the point of total abandonment.

This all brings me to the topic of total abandonment… living a life abandoned to God. 

Can one really live like this?  I’m on a quest to find out. 

Isaiah was abandoned to God, “Here am I, send me!”

That’s my focus these days.

I know how I hope to be living this out in the next year or so.  I hope that the plans all work out.  Until then, I am going to enjoy the journey and take each step one at a time.  I may end up where “I” want to be serving the Lord… or the journey could lead to some other discoveries of God that I’ve yet to uncover. 

I’m going to enjoy the journey of being in His presence all along the way.

I attended a youth testimonial time tonight at church.  I wonder how many of them knew what the future held for them a year before they each got involved in 1 of 3 missions opportunities over the summer? 

I’ll go where You send me… I want to be Your hands and feet.

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3 thoughts on “abandon self

  1. Total abandonment – yes, it is very hard. I want to be there too – I find it easiest to deny myself the bigger “objects of my affection” (materialism, popularity, damaging media) but hardest to surrender the small, daily things like not snipping at my co-worker when he’s annoying the crap out of me, gossip, and coveting the wealth of others…

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