“It’s crooked!”

We had a ceiling fan that was not working.  So back in April, we purchased another one to replace it.  Lori wanted the new one in the living room and the one in the living room moved to the den.  Nothing is ever easy!  So, I did as I was commanded… I mean lovingly asked to do… yes, that’s what I meant to say.

Lori was gone grocery shopping so I decided to go ahead remove the one she wanted moved and install the new one.  I was just about finished when she got back home.  She walks in and drops off the first load of groceries.  As she walks back for the next load of groceries she stated,  “It’s crooked!”

With great patience, I thought silently to myself, “WHAT!!!!”  Then jokingly said aloud, “You mean to tell me that is all you’ve got to say? It’s crooked!” 

She said, “Yes.” 

I said, “Yes ‘mam… I’m sorry ‘mam!  Would you like some help with the groceries and a glass of tea?”

That’s what it’s like to live with The Warrior when she is NOT praying. 

OK truth be told – that really happened.  And that is how the exchange went… Sort of.  She just didn’t realize I only had 3 of the 4 blades attached. I wasn’t finished.  The room was dark – so I have to cut her some slack. 

The weird thing about this is that’s how it goes in life.  Work hard to get the job done and all that can be brought out are words that discourage rather than encourage. 

Encouragement can be done in tough situations.  It’s finding the right words to say that bring life to the person.  It’s not easy… especially when all you see is the ceiling fan kit leaning up on the ceiling in the dark. 

It’s tough at times to lead and motivate people.  There really is an art to it.  I don’t think I’m very good artist… I guess my skills at times make me feel like I am a beginner at finger painting. 

I love encouraging people… In fact, that’s one thing in life I know I’m pretty good at.  The correcting part is kind of difficult for me.  I guess it depends on the environment and the relationships that have been built that determines how I respond to tougher situations.  I’ve been burned a few times and it’s harder to get back up.  I lack some confidence here.

I worked in this one church (in a different town).  It was the most painful experience in leadership.  We grew in numbers ever so slightly.  But I was more of a glorified baby sitter than anything.  I had one kid in the youth group (this happened my first month) take so many fireworks to camp. He could have exploded the dorm that all of the guys at the camp were housed in!!  Things only got worse from there.

I kept trying… then the parents were on my case.  I had one couple who volunteered to help who ended up trying to get me fired.  As soon as I resigned they were first in line to ask for the job!  Unbelievable!!  So, I have had difficulty trusting others who want to help me.

“It’s crooked!”  Is all a matter of ones perspective.  To Lori it was crooked… it was… but I wasn’t finished. 

The next time someone around you doesn’t seem to have it together and you want to tell them, “It’s crooked!”  Step back – try to look at it from all sides before making a judgment.  Lead and encourage from there…

I finished the installation and we enjoyed the fan all summer.

2 thoughts on ““It’s crooked!”

  1. I have the same problem. I encourage everyone around me yet I am always telling Nat he did something wrong or that there is a “better” way to do it. God knows I make more mistakes than he does. And I could probably count on one hand how many times in 13 years that Nat has brought my mistakes to my attention. And when he did, it was very politely. I’m learning though!

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